Have To vs. Get To

Before I found my way to DEUCE I used to travel around the country to different college sports teams and coach them for a 3-day team building/mental skills workshop. With a few years of professional baseball and a bachelors in Psychology in my back pocket, I tried to teach these teams what I had learned and studied in regards to emotional intelligence and general mindset practices. I say all this simply to illustrate to you that I have seen the power of how the mind can transform the way young men and women approach their sport and find success.

Suffice to say, our energy and overall willingness to do anything in life is centered around our mindset. But here is the uncomfortable truth about our mind. It is constantly under attack from our environment and if left unchecked, it can start to control us instead of us controlling it. There is a lot of freedom, however, in knowing that our mindset is pliable because this means that we have the power to control it. And control it we must.

There are numerous techniques in the world of sport and high performance psychology but you didn’t come here for a lecture nor do I want to give one, so let’s talk about my favorite mindset “hack” if you will. It’s called REFRAMING. It requires seeing something in a new way and more importantly in a context that allows us to recognize and appreciate positive aspects of our situation. 

For example, I always felt like I HAD to do homework in school and I despised it honestly. My mindset sucked but if I knew then what I know now I would have reframed the situation to feel like I GET to do homework. I would’ve understood how blessed and lucky I was to study at a University and learn and expand my mind in a way most people never get the opportunity to do. The appreciation for what I was doing surely would have improved my experience and probably my grades as well. Sorry mom and dad.

My point is this: a better experience in whatever you are doing is right around the corner and easily accessible if you are willing to reframe your mindset from “I have to” to “I get to”. You GET to show up to the gym and move your body. You GET to change the diaper because you have a beautiful and healthy child. You GET to wake up at 5am because you have a paying job while others sleep shoeless on the sidewalk.

So if you’re feeling down in the dumps or unmotivated in any way, start with gratitude and a “Get To” mentality. You’re going to like the way it feels, I guarantee it.