Tough Feedback on Tough Love

December 15, 2020 | By

If there’s one thing I’m adamant about when it comes to coaching someone through their first ice bath, it’s that everyone in the surrounding area is bought in on respecting the space surrounding the person in the ice.

Shouting Let’s go! or Don’t be a wimp!, quite simply, is not allowed. I’d like for you to lower the volume of your voice, to sit instead stand (so you’re not towering over your fellow icer) and – perhaps most importantly – to acknowledge that the experience of whoever is in the ice is different than yours, and that it’s their experience to navigate, not yours. In the game of cold exposure adaptation at Breath & Exposure, heightened awareness is as critical as breathing mechanics. 

Tough love: treating/being treated harshly in a way that’s intended to help in the long run. At some point, you’ve experienced this on the sending or receiving end. And while I’ll be the first to admit a deep appreciation for tough love guidance from folks like David Goggins or Tim Grover, I’m here to say to the same degree that tough love is not always a useful option. Often, it’s something that feels good to dish out, but is more hurtful than helpful when it comes to positively impacting the person/people you’re intending to positively impact.

A little homework assignment for you to test out today – audit the efficacy of your support for those around you. Negative feedback is necessary and tough love can be extremely useful. But not to the extent that well-intended words & behavior break down more than build up. 

More strength doesn’t mean more support when it comes to interpersonal connection. I dare you to flex that conscientious muscle & better leverage empathy for the win.

12/15/20 WOD

DEUCE ATHLETICS GPP

[Meet at Anderson Park]

DEUCE BACKLOT GPP

[Meet at Pan Pacific Park]

DEUCE GARAGE GPP

5-5-5
Snatch High Pull

3-3-3
Snatch

Then, perform 3 rounds for quality:
16 Alt DB Renegade Rows
16 Barbell Skull Crushers

Then, every 3 minutes for 15 minutes, complete the following for time:
12/8 Calories (Row/Bike)
10 Jump Squats

Originally from Northern Virginia, Kimmy is a high-voltage human with a passion for optimal experience. She has a Bachelor’s and a Master’s degree in Communication from George Mason University, where she was a two-sport NCAA Division I athlete (soccer & track), and taught communication courses for four years. After college, Kimmy spent a decade coaching and teaching in Virginia prior to moving to California. She is an NLP Practitioner, XPT Level 3 Coach, CrossFit Level 2 Trainer, and was the 2018 Virginia State High School Coach of the Year, where she led her soccer team to a state title in her second year as head coach. Kimmy created and currently runs the Breath & Exposure program at DEUCE Gym. Committed to a lifetime of better understanding human perception, Kimmy is enthusiastic about teaching others how breath, exposure and movement can help them live healthier, more peaceful lives.