Forgetting to Be Afraid 101

It wasn’t until I was on board my second flight in as many days to visit strangers in a new city to somehow communicate the details of my book that I realized I was afraid. My awareness, like most, is spotty. I realized that all of my life as of late has been quite terrifying (in retrospect) and, while I’d been doing it, I’d seemingly forgotten to be afraid. 

Of course, this article isn’t for me, so why am I telling you this? Well, there’s something important in it for you, but before I get there I’ll need to get something clear with you. The fear that I intermittently realize has become so normal in my life that I can’t say it’s a negative thing. I’m not saying I’m tortured by fear, I’m saying I’m enrolled in things that would understandably be scary.

In reflecting on it, I feel like I’ve walked a long tight rope and realized after crossing many dangerous passes that it should have been scary all along. If you’re wondering what’s possibly “good” about that, consider that if the fear was paid more closely attention to that much of the tight rope walking wouldn’t have happened and it surely would have been a lot less enjoyable. I’m afraid of heights, after all.

I’m talking about fear inoculation. If I’ve got a message for you today, it’s that you can train yourself out of the common state of paralysis that many people stagnate in because of fear. Making difficult decisions, choosing uncomfortable environments, and leaping into the better versions of you can be scary. The only thing that makes this more daunting is not having the support of very many reps of being afraid. 

I’m deathly afraid of public speaking. If there was such a thing, I’d be clinically introverted. And, I struggle with all the same financial worries that you do. Yet, I reflected this weekend and realized that I’ve been almost unknowingly and endlessly putting myself in scary situations. Hell, I’m grateful for it, too. The reason it’s been happening under my nose like this is it’s been normalized in my life. A small, important risk has turned into another and another and another and now I’m grateful to recognize that I’ve done some many things that I can say I’m both incredibly proud of and also scared me to death. 

If fear is impeding your progress, make smaller risks a habit. Get used to living in the uncomfortable pocket. Soon you may realize that you’ve done the thing you’ve always wanted to do and that you forgot to let it scare you. 

Logan Gelbrich   

@functionalcoach