FFOTB Nation Does Thanksgiving

Can’t you picture it? The entire FFOTB community at a long dining room table fit for the Queen of England, with piles and piles of food in the center. We are indeed a family, at least if you ask me. Just like any family we are full of different personalities and hilarious mannerisms. Not to mention, we have an arsenal of stories about each other that stack up like ammunition in our minds. Surely, there will be a hilarious war of words that walks the fine line between mean teasing and unconditional love.

I know you all can see it… Big Perm is being aggressive with his requests to pass the rolls. Melanie is screaming bloody murder about something. Randy thought it was a good idea to wear his tights to Thanksgiving dinner, and has become the world’s biggest target for Asian slurs. Hereby replacing the same role, the Godfather himself, Jun held just months prior. He respectfully wore the same outfit he’s depicted wearing in the oil painting of himself that is hung over the mantel.

If you notice, Jose took pictures when the veggies came out, but he is in it to win it during dessert. Tyler is counting himself down..3..2…1…. in between bites, and his wife finished dinner first, because Ashley wins everything. Ashley Wynn is jamming out on her guitar like the holiday season has never seen– meaning she was strumming in Warrior Three. Brian (IPG) showed up, but he’s in and out of the dining room checking on his car that’s parked in the red. Thanks to Kara there are exactly the right number of utensils, plates, and glasses– she simply took the number of people attending, added their birthday, minus the total visible stars in the sky. And, divided that by the channel of her favorite TV show.

Don’t forget Andrew, whose sitting at the head of the table in his high performance Dockers educating us on the intricacies of the Stone Pine subspecies, “Pinus pinea, the Stone Pine grows to 12–20 metres (39–66 ft) in height, and can..” Lindsey is listening intently, in the bottom of a squat, of course. Eyes got wide again, when the conversation turned to the unassuming fan favorite, Jenn. Realizing she trumped us all in athleticism was a bit hard to swallow for some. Anne got so riled up she couldn’t get through her meal without bending the silverware, even the dinner table was opportune time to engage her core.

Surely, Jacob is rushing us to finish because there is a game of beach volleyball to be had, and though we can’t see her over the edge of the table, Gabie, is screaming in agreement. Marek is laughing about God-knows-what, and Emily is surely egging her on. Luckily, every quiet moment was met with a question from Berm-town, so conversation flowed like wine.

We were all surprised when D. Pat showed up in his speedo. Things kinda got weird when all the girls proceeded to kneel in his presence. I couldn’t make this up if I tried. You had to see it. It was like “seeing Jesus on toast.” Later, theBig Irishman, Jamie, stole the show when he was helicoptered in for an ad hoc “Show and Tell” performance. His routine included a full squat, touching of his toes, and three magnificent cartwheels!

Ryan brought an appetizer. Deviled Chicken Legs? He said it had something to do with lunges. Scott didn’t approve, but he played along. And, outside of the fact that Andrea wore her AT&T switchboard operator headset the entire time, everyone’s table manners were surprisingly good.

And, we can’t forget to recognize the cook. Nikki brought us our Thanksgiving treats from the kitchen with a smile on her face, the turkey in one hand, and “the bird” flying high in the other. Contrary to popular belief you CAN trust the skinny cook! As soon as she put the last plate on the table, I urged the group to indulge, “Gotta go! Gotta go!”

Happy Thanksgiving!

Logan Gelbrich

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Wednesday’s Workout:

With one person working at a time, complete the following with a partner for time:

Partner A does 100 KB SDLHP

Partner B does 100 KB Swings

Partner A does 100 Mountain Climbers

Partner B does 100 Prisoner Squats

**Anytime the working partner breaks, the non-working partner completes 50m bear crawl. Then the working partner resumes.